We both fell asleep on the floor, then I left you there
You spent so many days alone, so I’ll kill myself to make things fair
See I just hated being tired cause I can’t seem to sleep anymore
You and all your friends were all right about me all along
Do you sleep anymore?
I would love to be patient, but I just won’t wait
I’m getting sick and tired of the smile that I fake every day
I would love to speak my mind, but I can’t think straight
I would love to feel alive again, but I’m not used to change
Do you sleep anymore?
And if it make’s you feel better, I’ll be on my way
And all this time I sit around and think, but there’s nothing to say
And if you want to feel better, I’ll stay out of your way
And I would love to feel alive again, but I guess that can wait
12:20 am • 5 December 2013 • 4 notes
I just wish everyone could understand it. Every word is so on point.
"When someone gives up on life, what does it look like? It looks like they go to work, they come home, they turn on the t.v. ,they eat their dinner from fast food place, they go to sleep, they go to work…that’s giving up on life. Suicidal feelings is a desperate need to change your life and an absolute feeling of powerlessness to make that change. Find out what the person wants to change and help them get a little bit of power in their life and to do that you have to talk with them.
The most important thing for anyone who has any kind of urge to end their own life is to talk about it with someone. And we made it something that is shameful…We have a whole culture that you can’t be vulnerable, you can’t show weakness…So there is no space to talk about vulnerable feelings at all because you’re seen as weak, and a failure, what’s your problem and just get it together. And then, if you do talk about it, the judgement and the intervention is so heavy that you learn very quickly that I better not talk about that anymore if I don’t want to get locked up again.”
11:45 pm • 4 December 2013 • 4 notes
From an interview with Thom Yorke
||It’s like being trapped in one…space, like one point.
||(holds up one finger) And you can’t go backwards and you can’t go forwards and you can’t go in any direction; you’re absolutely trapped in one particular space in time, and you cannot move on--because I use music to move on, to progress through life. And so when I lost that, I lost the ability to progress, or anything...so you start to lose the ability to interact, and it becomes like a vicious circle, because you’re just like this all the time.
||(imitates being paralyzed)
||So you’re sitting there at home all the time doing nothing, or is it….?
||No, it’s just every time you go to a piece of music, or read a book, or…go for a drive in your car, you’re constantly thinking that you’re trapped...you’re stuck, you’re like a full stop, and you’ll never be anything else.
||I think the only way that you deal with it, eventually, is you--you just forget about it. You choose to not have a problem about it, you choose to go and see your friends and go out and get…drunk and enjoy life and just forget about it and just wait for...wait for it to come back.
3:45 pm • 4 December 2013 • 287 notes
“There are essentially only two drugs that Western civilization tolerates: Caffeine from Monday to Friday to energize you enough to make you a productive member of society, and alcohol from Friday to Monday to keep you too stupid to figure out the prison that you are living in.”
— Bill Hicks (via thingsthatsing)
9:48 pm • 3 December 2013 • 6,627 notes
We are as a society completely backwards about sucide. What we’ve done is we’ve reached a point where we consider the urge to kill yourself as a symptom of a biological brain disorder that needs medical treatment and if people don’t want it, we force them to get it. And what this does is that, first of all, it spreads fear around the whole issue, it makes it so we feel like we can’t talk about it, that we have to turn it over to professionals and then when people do talk about it, they are so quickly judged and then the interventions come in and they’re forced into the hospital or they check in voluntarily and find that they can’t get out or they’re in the hospital and they say that they don’t want a medication and then they find that they have to take it or they get provoked by the staff in the hospital and find that they are in restraints.
We have responded so forcefully and so oppressively to feelings of suicide that we’ve removed spaces where people can just talk about their despair. The most important thing for anyone who has any kind of urge to end their own life is to talk about it with someone. And we made it something that is shameful…We have a whole culture that you can’t be vulnerable, you can’t show weakness…So there is no space to talk about vulnerable feelings at all because you’re seen as weak, and a failure, what’s your problem and just get it together. And then, if you do talk about it, the judgement and the intervention is so heavy that you learn very quickly that I better not talk about that anymore if I don’t want to get locked up again. So I feel like we are just backwards and I encourage anyone who has suicidal feelings to find someone and get an agreement where the person is not going to judge them and not going to react and do anything without their consent and to talk about it.
And to recognize that when someone is feeling suicidal they have the same needs all of us do—to just be listened to and to be connected with because they have a reason for feeling suicidal and it’s not giving up on life. When someone gives up on life what does it look like? It looks like they go to work, they come home, they turn on the t.v. ,they eat their dinner from fast food place, they go to sleep, they go to work…that’s giving up on life. Suicidal feelings is a desparate need to change your life and an absolute feeling of powerlessness to make that change. Find out what the person wants to change and help them get a little bit of power in their life and to do that you have to talk with them.
Will Hall on suicide (via madness-narrative)
Link to the youtube video:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WLm2Ub7fz0U (via dreamsandzines)
The struggle, so eloquently described.
8:48 pm • 3 December 2013 • 923 notes
Was it really some other person I was so anxious to discover, when I did all of that looking, or was it only my own solitude that I could not abide?
Wandering through this endless nothingness. Once in a while, when I was not mad, I would turn poetic instead. I honestly did let myself think about things in such ways.
The eternal silence of these infinite spaces frightens me.
— David Markson — from Wittgenstein’s Mistress (via slothnorentropy)
12:54 am • 28 November 2013 • 16 notes
I’ll drown my beliefs
To have your babies
I’ll dress like your niece
And wash your swollen feet
Just don’t leave
12:44 am • 28 November 2013 • 1 note
“For years, mental health professionals taught people that they could be psychologically healthy without social support, that “unless you love yourself, no one else will love you.”… The truth is you cannot love yourself unless you have been loved and are loved. The capacity to love cannot be built in isolation.”
— Bruce D. Perry, M.D., Ph.D., “The Boy Who Was Raised As A Dog” (via thinfear)
(Source: cockedlockedandchoking, via tryagain--failbetter)
1:39 am • 27 November 2013 • 41,114 notes
“Some people want to read police stories with a Mickey Spillane theme: a hardened guy with a .38 under his arm and a whiskey glass on his desk, investigating a leggy dame in stiletto heels with a big chest that hides a heart as cold as a pawnbroker’s appraisal. Instead, this book is about the sort of cop who walks through fifty yards of gore and thinks about Socrates while he steps over human body parts. Much of the writing is about philosophy, and theology, and psychology, and such ruminations are there in the hopes of finding some meaning in this ocean of human tears.”
7:39 pm • 25 November 2013
“Oh, gentlemen, perhaps I really regard myself as an intelligent man only because throughout my entire life I’ve never been able to start or finish anything.”
— Fyodor Dostoevsky, Notes from Underground (via flower—girl)
9:24 am • 15 November 2013 • 34 notes